When people think about adoption, they often picture the joyful moment a child joins a family. While those moments are real and worth celebrating, many adoptive families will tell you that the road to adoption is rarely straightforward. Waiting, uncertainty, changing plans, and even a disrupted adoption can become part of the journey.
For Mike and Stephanie, adoption has brought incredible joy, unexpected heartbreak, and a deeper understanding of what it means to persevere through life’s challenges.
When Adoption Doesn’t Go as Planned
After Stephanie’s battle with cancer left the couple unable to grow their family biologically, Mike and Stephanie began exploring adoption. Like many hopeful adoptive parents, they entered the process with open hearts but little understanding of just how complex adoption could be.
“We really didn’t know anything about adoption. The whole thing was overwhelming.”
While working with an adoption coordinator, Stephanie and Mike were given a list of agencies to explore. One conversation with Courageous Hearts Adoptions stood out. “We weren’t a number and the moms weren’t a number,” Stephanie recalled. That sense of connection and authenticity helped them feel confident they had found the right partner for their adoption journey.
A Journey They Never Expected
Like many hopeful adoptive parents, Mike and Stephanie assumed adoption would follow a fairly straightforward path. Instead, their journey would take them across multiple states, through moments of immense joy, and through grief they never anticipated.
Their first adoption match ended in a disruption. While disappointing, it happened early in the process and they remained hopeful about continuing their adoption journey.
Then came Wyatt.
In June 2024, they were matched with a 10-month-old little boy in Indiana. After being matched with Wyatt, they spent time caring for him while important decisions were being made. At one point, they thought they would have to say goodbye. They drove home heartbroken, believing their opportunity to become Wyatt’s parents had come to an end.
“We drove home crying for four hours,” Stephanie recalled.
Later that same day, Laronda from CHA called with news of another potential adoption opportunity. An expectant mother in Arizona had selected them and was due the following month. Cautiously hopeful, Mike and Stephanie moved forward with the match, though they kept it private from many friends and family members after the disappointment they had just experienced.
Then, a week later, another unexpected call changed everything.
Wyatt’s birth mother had decided to move forward with the adoption after all. Mike and Stephanie returned to Indiana, spending two weekends with Wyatt while completing the interstate adoption process.
At the same time, their Arizona adoption journey was also moving forward at the decision of the expectant mother.
Just days after returning home with Wyatt, they learned the expectant mother in Arizona would be induced. They quickly completed the additional paperwork and home study requirements needed to pursue a second adoption while adjusting to life with a 10-month old at home.
Within days, they were back on a plane to Arizona. The couple believed they might be welcoming two sons into their family. Instead, they experienced a loss that would change them forever.
After his birth, their baby Henry spent time in the NICU. Mike and Stephanie remained by his side, loving him. Despite everyone’s hopes, Henry passed away after one week.
The grief was profound.
At home, family and friends were celebrating Wyatt’s arrival. Privately, Mike and Stephanie were mourning the loss of a baby many people never had the chance to meet.
“It was an incredibly painful loss,” Stephanie shared about their journey.
The experience left them carrying two very different emotions at the same time—gratitude for the son they had just welcomed into their family and heartbreak for the child they had lost.
After taking time to heal and focus on Wyatt, they eventually felt ready to pursue adoption again. Earlier this year, they experienced another disruption when an adoption plan changed shortly before placement.
Through every setback, they have continued moving forward with openness, resilience, and hope.
“We know going into adoption there are no guarantees.”
Today, when they reflect on their journey, they know it has looked nothing like they expected. Yet one truth remains clear.
“To have Wyatt is a blessing.”
Why Support Matters After an Adoption Disruption
The emotional impact of a disrupted adoption is significant, but many families are surprised to learn about the financial impact as well.
Travel, legal expenses, medical support, agency fees, and other adoption-related expenses can quickly add up. When an adoption is disrupted, those costs can create additional stress for families who are already processing disappointment and grief.
For Mike and Stephanie, support made a tremendous difference.
They describe Courageous Hearts Adoptions as a consistent source of encouragement throughout the process. CHA staff regularly checked in, talked through concerns, and helped connect them with resources when adoption-related expenses became overwhelming.
Even when they were not ready to pursue another adoption immediately, they never felt forgotten.
For families navigating a disrupted adoption, having a support system can make all the difference.
Finding Joy Through Adoption
While adoption brought challenges, it also brought them Wyatt.
Today, Mike and Stephanie can’t imagine their family any other way.
“To have Wyatt is a blessing.”
Now approaching three years old, Wyatt fills their home with laughter, curiosity, and adventure. He loves toy cars, dancing, learning his letters and numbers, and talking up a storm.
“Wyatt is amazing. [Parenthood is] the best thing ever.”
When Mike and Stephanie talk about Wyatt, it’s clear that he has brought immeasurable joy to their lives. He has also reminded them that adoption stories don’t always unfold the way we expect.
“It’s not perfect. It’s not going to be what you think it’s gonna be.”
For them, that’s not a negative lesson. It’s a reminder that some of life’s greatest blessings arrive in ways we never planned.
A Message for Families Experiencing a Disrupted Adoption
One of the biggest lessons Mike and Stephanie have learned is that adoption rarely looks exactly the way you expect it to.
“It’s not perfect. It’s not going to be what you think it’s gonna be,” says Mike.
Instead of focusing on what might have been, they encourage prospective adoptive parents to remain flexible and open to where the journey leads.
“Be prepared to roll with the punches and be flexible. The blessings in the end are worth it.”
For families currently experiencing a disrupted adoption, their story offers an important reminder: you are not alone. The emotions that come with adoption disruptions are real and valid. Healing takes time, and every family’s journey looks different.
A disrupted adoption does not mean your story is over.
How You Can Help
Stories like Mike and Stephanie’s remind us that a disrupted adoption affects more than emotions—it can create significant financial barriers that make it difficult for families to continue pursuing adoption.
At Courageous Hearts Adoptions, we believe hopeful adoptive families should not have to walk these challenges alone. Through ongoing support, education, and connections to financial assistance resources, we help families navigate both the difficult and joyful moments of adoption.
Your donation can help provide critical support to families experiencing a disrupted adoption or dissolved adoption, helping them continue their adoption journey when they are ready.
If you are considering adoption and would like to learn more about the support, education, and guidance Courageous Hearts Adoptions provides, we would love to connect with you. Whether you are just beginning to explore adoption or are ready to take the next step, our team is here to walk alongside you every step of the way.
Contact Courageous Hearts Adoptions today to learn more about adopting with our agency or to support families on their adoption journey.
